The way toward independence is more interesting than I thought. There are many discoveries, and that allowed me to live more easily.
Today, I will talk about it from the perspective of honesty with ourselves.
How to live honestly
Sometimes, we want to live honestly, especially with ourselves.
Lying to others but also ourselves stresses us. We have to make up for the lies. We always care not to be caught in a lie. That exhausts us.
That is why we want to live honestly.
However, we sometimes cannot do it due to confusion about values.
The lies we have told often hide our values from us because we have to pretend seriously to be so. It is like actors. Every role is important. That makes us forget which role we originally played as time goes by. In other words, that is one reason that we cannot distinguish between our values and those of others.
In such a case, knowing the independent way of life might help. It tells us we can trust the fluctuating wants of our body to the fullest in this way of life. Today, I will introduce the way of life.
Contradictory wants of our bodies
We don’t know ourselves well because we are only the consciousness of our bodies. There are elements in our body that we have no control over, such as our subconsciousness and our physical body. They are inconsistent and often fluctuate.
Let’s be honest. We might have the following contradictory wants:
- We just want to be satisfied with ourselves, but we also want to be pleased or rewarded by someone else.
- We don’t want to be tired, but we also don’t want to be idle.
- We want to challenge a little hard problem, but we don’t want any troubles in our lives.
- We want to spend money, but we also want to save.
- We want to watch a movie and laugh, but we also want to cry.
Then, our bodies say with simplicity,
“I want both! Hey you, Mr. Consciousness, do something!”
It is completely incoherent! We might want to ask, “Decide which one you want to do!” It is as if we are a baby. It looks selfish and like a spoiled child.
Social life vs. independent life
If we try to live socially, we cannot allow those fluctuations because we have to be consistent. We must conform our attitudes to social demands, or we are eliminated. We cannot even take a day off without permission. This is the cause of our suffering.
However, there is another way: the one toward independence.
There are differences as follows:
- In social life, we don’t have to build our consistency. We just have to kill our one aspect and fit into the cogs of society. Although we don’t need to bother with unknowns, we must sacrifice one aspect of ourselves.
- In an independent way of life, we can fulfill ourselves with the sacrifice of consistency for society. In other words, we have to build our own consistency from the messy wants within us. Although we are unavoidable to face unknowns, we can fulfill ourselves completely.
If you have individuality, the latter could suit you. Let me explain how we can live in such a way.
Sense of independent living
In an independent way of life, we move through uncertainty. In this way, we proceed,
“For now, let’s go as far as I can. When the limit comes, let’s think about it at that time.”
Although this looks thoughtless, this is the rational way to advance because we don’t know what is out there. We don’t know many things, such as about this world, what the future holds, how the future unfolds, how this world changes, and even when our mood changes.
In this situation, we have no choice but to go as far as we can. There is no point in staying where we are.
This doesn’t mean we become reckless or unprepared. We anticipate risks and prepare.
However, we also know there are neither perfect preparations nor full outlooks. That is why we have no choice but to go as far as we can now.
Living with discovery and adaptation
In this way, an accident is not trouble. It is discovery.
The most common accident is environmental change. We encounter things or events that we didn’t expect.
We adjust ourselves to the accident, not to the schedule, because the environment is always right.
For example, assume we are walking in a direction on our journey. If we unexpectedly come across a river, we adapt to the accident instead of trying to get over it as planned.
We decide it by mood. If we are thirsty, we drink water. If we want a break, we take a break there. If we find food nearby there, we may make it our new base.
The life without social concepts
What we do is discover and adapt, not following a schedule. This is because the schedule is a concept of society. If we head toward independence, we don’t need such a social concept.
We have to let go of other social teachings at least once as well.
The only thing we can rely on is our mood based on our senses.
Our bodies might say to us,
“I want to stay here. I am a little hungry and feel tired.”
“I feel like climbing to the top of that hill. I may be able to see the road ahead.”
“I found a new path! It is great! Let’s go! Staying here is a waste of time!”
“It is kind of unsettling. I heard the howl of a wolf. A large knife makes me feel safe. Let’s keep it handy.”
These words are more reliable than anyone’s teachings. Inconsistent words suddenly become the best advice for survival.
Mood: the most reliable sense
In this state, we can understand that our contradictory, fluctuating wants never bother us. This is the harmonious state of an independent way of life.
We can use our potential to the fullest. We prepare for the unknown future. We try to understand the current situation correctly and modify ourselves to it. We don’t have to lie to others or ourselves.
We don’t need an ideal image of successful people. We also don’t have to tell ourselves, “I should do this.” This is because we don’t know even the ideal state. The state following our fluctuating inner voice is an ideal.
We use what we have on the spot. There are always changes. That allows us to be creative.
In this state, we are consistent, even if we have contradictory wants. We don’t have to sacrifice one aspect of our desires. We can live honestly without confusion about values.
Conclusion
That is the independent way of life.
It tells us we can trust the fluctuating wants of our body to the fullest in that way of life.
This knowledge might help you to live honestly and fulfill yourself.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
