First, announcement. Since I began preparing to move, I will update simple articles for a while. I want to finish my move and settle down by the middle of December.
Today, I will explain the difference between how we deal with emotions when we have an inferiority complex and after we have resolved it. Although I have already explained this several times, I like this concept and often use it these days.
How to control our emotions
Sometimes, we want to control our emotions and have a peaceful mind. If we cannot do it, uncontrollable emotions often exhaust us. We could have many stubborn emotions, such as worry, sadness, or anger.
Not only negative emotions but also positive emotions can harm us. Although being too positive makes us tired and want to rest, we reject it because it is negative. That is also an exhausting state.
That is why we need an appropriate way to manage our emotions.
However, we often don’t know it. That accelerates our exhaustion.
Today, I will explain how to deal with emotions. This knowledge might help us resolve our uncontrollable emotions.
Feeling the emotions as they are
We can control emotions after we feel them as they are. If we cannot understand what the emotion is, we cannot control it.
In other words, we never try to control them as long as we feel we are not in control of the emotion. All we can do is feel.
If we can fully understand the emotion, it becomes obedient.
To make it easier to understand, I will explain the difference between how we deal with emotions when we have an inferiority complex and after we have resolved it.
- When we have an inferiority complex, we try to control our emotions as much as possible. People with an inferiority complex tend to believe that a mentally strong person doesn’t feel unnecessary emotions and can control his emotions perfectly.
- After we resolve an inferiority complex, we don’t try to control our emotions. We allow all of them to arise. We feel many emotions, such as worry, sadness, anger, joy, or happiness. We depress and cry. Although it looks childish, we know it calms our emotions and allows us to follow our values.
Although they look similar, distinguishing these differences makes a big difference.
Emotions that are meant to be felt
Emotions are meant to be felt. In other words, we can accept all of them. There are no emotions that are unacceptable to us. Although refusing to feel emotions allows us to be patient in the short term, it creates suffering in the long run.
Feeling all our emotions means accepting ourselves. Emotions are part of us. We don’t deny our parts. That gives us the feeling of living as we are.
On the other hand, when we deny a part of us, it means self-denial. The mental system that creates emotions is a part of us. That is why repressing emotions causes a sense of self-denial.
The concept of the inner child
The concept of the inner child and mental duality is the same thing. Someone described the inferiority complex as an ‘inner child.’ Although describing it as a child is a little strange, we have such another aspect of ourselves.
Perhaps the inner child concept is for people who are good at interacting with children. On the other hand, if we are empathic and creative, we might not be good at it.
In such a case, we can think of them as duality. Imagine we have two sides. We always have contradictory wants. That might be effective in allowing ourselves to act inconsistently.
The concept of ‘Name it to tame it’
Some psychologists suggest, ‘Name it to tame it.’ It means if we know the name of the emotion, we can control it.
This is the same as feeling the emotions as they are. If we face them sincerely, we can understand the emotion’s name. That calms the emotion down.
Even if we act inconsistently, we will begin to find the consistent direction we are heading. Perhaps it will be an independent life if we are empathic and creative. We might want to do everything freely and creatively, not to follow others’ orders. We might not be good at socializing or belonging to organizations. If we accept them, they will tell us we are heading toward independence.
In other words, we don’t have to refuse our emotions. They may seem inconsistent, but they are consistent.
Conclusion
That would be one of the ways to deal with emotions.
We can control emotions after we feel them as they are.
This knowledge might help us resolve our uncontrollable emotions.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
