I have experienced emotional movements these days due to the necessity to leave my current house. They told me how my mind works.
Today, I will talk about empathy.
How to change our lives without hesitation
Sometimes, we want to change the direction of life without hesitation. Many stressful things exhaust us. That makes us want to live more naturally.
Although precaution is necessary to avoid fatal problems, being unable to move forever is more problematic. That means eternal stagnation. That will exhaust us.
Empathy is one factor that prevents us from changing. It is a feature that allows us to feel others’ emotions, including their values. Although it is effective in helping weak people, it often bothers us when changing ourselves. We don’t need to feel others’ values when we decide to go in our own direction.
That is why I recommend refraining from activities that use empathy when we want change. Empathy suppresses our values and puts others first.
However, I realized there is a case where empathy could encourage us to change. That is when we feel unchanging love. That maximizes our energy to make our lives. Today, I will explain it through my experience.
Four senses based on our personalities
People have several senses based on their personalities. They are competition, sociality, empathy, and logic, as shown in the following image:
If we are empathic and creative, we have two senses: empathy and logical sense. In this article, assume we are such people.
The relationship between empathy and logical sense
Empathy and logical sense often oppose each other. When we judge logically, empathy might warn us not to be selfish and not to bother others. When we imagine a fantastic future, the logical sense might tell us it is unrealistic. They stop our new action.
When we head toward more independence, we are often more logical than empathetic because independence is prioritizing our individualities, as I mentioned above. In other words, logic is a method to change, while empathy is a method to stabilize.
However, we can also move stably in a changing direction. If we use empathy properly, it allows us to change steadily. Perhaps that is the best state to change.
My case of getting energy to change from empathy
Let me explain it through my recent experience. As I mentioned above, I had to leave this current house and look for a new one.
My logical sense told me to go, but my empathy made me stop. Logically, it was an opportunity to begin my secluded life in the countryside. I dreamed of it for a long time. However, my empathy warned me what would happen if I failed. It made me imagine all the possibilities of failure.
That made my preparations and progress stagnate. Although I had found candidates for my next house, I could not proceed anymore. With so many possibilities, I could not narrow it down to just one.
In other words, I feared making a mistake and losing money or effort. I wanted the right answer to what will happen in the future.
My grandmother’s words
The next early morning I felt such a limit, I met my grandmother in a dream. She was the grandmother I loved with all my heart, and she died many years ago.
She said to me with her smile, “Keep going.” I felt her unchanging trust for me.
The next moment, I woke up with tears and could feel tremendous energy overflowing from my heart. Fear of superficial losses has completely disappeared.
It was the moment when my empathy allowed me to ‘go’ as well as my logical sense. My grandmother’s trust in me supported my empathy. From that moment, I no longer fear being discouraged or making superficial losses in my current activity.
I noticed I was too nervous about the fear of being discouraged or losing money. After I felt the trust in my way of life, I noticed they didn’t hurt me. They are not things to be afraid of at all. My natural way of life is more precious than those superficial losses.
Perhaps empathy gives us such energy if we can use it appropriately.
Empathy could accelerate our changes
We can use this mental work to move toward our independence.
Try imagining the loved one who loved us. Avoid using people close to us, such as parents or friends because we also know their confusion about values. Those inappropriate people might sometimes encourage us but sometimes deny us. A person who is dead or far away is better.
If there is no such person, we can also use ancestors, historical greats, saints, the gods, or something great. They understand our wants and directions in life. They are watching over us as we live true to ourselves. Although they don’t help us directly, they support our values.
People who grew up surrounded by love are easier to go their way. Perhaps that is the mental logic behind it.
Conclusion
There is a case where empathy could encourage us to change. That is when we feel unchanging love.
Empathy gives us the energy to change ourselves if we use it appropriately.
That might maximize our energy to make our lives better.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
