I have recently talked intensively about the concept of mental duality. That concept seems more useful to explain our mental work than I initially thought. Today, I will explain how to find the next fun activity after getting bored with something.
How to find the next fun activity
Sometimes, we want to find the next fun activity. We always get bored at some point, even if we have been happy and enthusiastic about something.
Getting bored is good mental work because we can keep growing. For example, we cannot enjoy the same video game forever because we learn how to clear it efficiently. It is the same as school. After learning in elementary school, we graduate and try to solve the next level of problems. That allows us to create a better life.
However, we sometimes cannot find the next fun activity.
That sometimes makes us envy people who have long-term activities. We might believe that long-term activities are more valuable than short-term ones. That often prevents us from finding our next fun activity.
Knowing the concept of mental duality might help in such a case. Today, I will explain how to find the next fun activity.
The concept of mental duality
Mental duality is the concept that we have at least two aspects of values.
I like to classify them into the following four values: winning competition, showing sociality, using empathy, and realizing something logically. Their relationships are as shown in the following image:
If we are people with empathy and creativity, we have two aspects of our senses: empathy and logic. In this article, we assume we are such people.
Achievement vs. self-realization
Achievement and self-realization are different ways.
If we want to influence society or others, we often show only one aspect. That makes it easy for others to understand the value we provide.
On the other hand, if we have individuality and want to progress comfortably in our lives, caring about our two aspects is effective. Our minds are not simple. We have to satisfy at least two conflicting desires. That allows us to fulfill our minds.
Confusing them causes mental problems. Not being able to find the next fun activity is one of them.
The fun thing on a different side
That mental work allows us to find a new fun activity. The next fun is on another side of our values.
Think about which aspects of our activities we enjoyed with recent activities. If we are empathic and creative, we consider which we have used primarily: empathy or logic.
Then, we focus on the other side of it. For example, if we have enjoyed creating empathic stories but get bored, we switch to logical activities.
In many cases, it looks irrelevant to our previous activities. In my case, after creating empathic stories, I got interested in the financial market. Although they are unrelated and contradictory, I enjoyed analyzing the logic of the economy.
We don’t have to be consistent because we are not simple.
That is why we sometimes struggle to find similar pleasures. We cannot enjoy the same side after getting bored with it. We have to switch to another aspect.
How to proceed while enjoying our activities
That tells us how to enjoy our activities. We enjoy proceeding while switching our aspects instead of achieving a goal.
We move forward with our inner compass instead of looking at a map. In other words, after we have advanced, we can understand the map of our footsteps and the meaning of what we have advanced.
Suppose we are in junior high school and want to write a diary. In that case, we will start it right away. All we need is one blank notebook and a pen. We write first what we want to write the most. We don’t need extra greetings or introductions. That satisfies us.
In addition, it helps us understand what we want to do through the diary. If we describe our emotional feelings, we will find that we want to satisfy our empathy. If we write causal relation or discovery, we will understand that we intend to fill our logical sense.
We often don’t know what aspect we want to fill in advance. That is the meaning of proceeding without a map. It is hard to imagine a clear goal.
The way of thinking to achieve
On the other hand, if we try to achieve something, we use another approach.
That would be patient work. In the case of writing a diary, we might try to set a clear goal or theme, write a lot of articles in one day, continue for at least one year, learn the writing skills of a professional essayist, find a well-known blogging platform, or think about topics with high searches.
That is the process with a map. Perhaps we can soon understand that such a style of writing a diary stresses us.
Doing what we want to do most first
There is a typical difference between achievement and self-realization.
In self-realization, we do what we want to do most first.
In the case of writing a diary, we write what we want to describe the most at the very beginning. There is no point in putting it off. That is why we can proceed while fulfilling ourselves.
Examples of the approach to achieving
On the other hand, if we try to achieve it, we cannot do it until the end because we have to learn and think about how to write a diary efficiently.
For example, I know an apprentice painter. He wanted to draw a beautiful girl but began to learn how to draw the skeleton flawlessly. Although he wanted to draw a girl, he drew bones every day that he didn’t like. Of course, he stopped its activity soon.
In my case, I once tried to play the piano. That was several years after I graduated from university. At that time, I was looked down on by others in the area of music and had an inferiority complex in it.
There were many heart-moving piano songs that I wanted to play. Despite them, I began learning boring piano fingering every day that I was not interested in. My inferiority complex made me do so. Of course, I gave it up soon.
Walking while switching between the two aspects
The concept of duality allows us to behave inconsistently. We can draw girls’ emotional expressions first. Then, after being satisfied with them, we might think logically about the structure of the skeleton. That might make us keep enjoying drawing.
In my case, I should have been able to enjoy playing songs emotionally without restrictions. After getting bored with the emotional side, perhaps I was able to learn piano fingering with joy.
Of course, we can stop those activities if we get bored. We can focus on an irrelevant activity, such as the analysis of the financial market.
Sometimes, we find we can note it in the diary. That allows us to continue to write it. However, keeping a diary is not the goal. A diary is part of our progression.
After walking while switching between the two aspects, we will see the direction. That is true consistency. Sticking to drawing or a diary is not the consistency.
Conclusion
We can find the next fun activity from the other side of our values.
We don’t have to find similar pleasures.
Knowing the concept of mental duality might help us find the next stage of life.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
