Perhaps I will continue the topic of mental duality a little longer because I discovered several logics behind our lives. Today, I will explain how to confront unexpected changes in ourselves by answering a question.
How to deal with unexpected aspects of ourselves
A while ago, one of this blog’s readers asked me a question. She was a creator. She had concentrated on her creation with joy for a long time.
However, after her marriage and giving birth to children, she realized she no longer enjoyed her creative activities. She could not come up with new ideas, and her obsession disappeared.
That shocked her because she felt she had lost something important to her.
On the other hand, she began to like books for people with high empathy.
She had to face her unexpected changes. She felt like her personality had changed. She wondered how to deal with this mental change. That was why she asked me.
Mindset in response to our change
Sometimes, we are surprised by unexpected changes in ourselves. Although we have a self-image, sometimes a different reaction that we had not expected occurs.
For example, we might find new aspects in ourselves, such as new interests, energy to act, ability to break through, courage, or resolution to change life. They could also be negative, such as losing interest or energy, stagnation, discouragement, or disappointment in ourselves.
Many factors could cause it, such as environmental changes, aging, achieving goals, giving up unnecessary things, feeling emotions, or starting to think logically.
At such times, we might feel like we have lost something important or are destroying our future, especially if we have lost interest in something fun. That worries us.
In such a case, knowing our aspects would tell us how to deal with this mental change. That would turn our concerns into new possibilities. Today, I will talk about it.
The four types of personalities
To explain that, let me introduce the four types of personalities we have not seen in a while. That is shown in the following image:
We classify our personalities by two axes: empathy and creativity.
The four senses
In other words, we could have four kinds of sense: competition, sociality, empathy, and logic. Their relationship is shown in the following image:
An explanation of each personality
We can classify our personalities into four types, as follows:
- Extroverts: People living with sociality and competitive sense. They are the social majority.
- Traditional empaths: People living with empathy and sociality.
- Innovative empaths: People living with empathy and logical sense. They are the minority.
- Innovators: People living with a competitive and logical sense.
Perhaps this blog’s readers tend to be innovative empaths. We assume we are such innovative empaths in this article.
The consistency of the type
Although our personality types can change in a small community, they are usually stable from the perspective of global society.
If we judge only in small communities, such as our families or friends, our personality type could change because our personalities are relative to society.
For example, if we are innovative empaths and enter a community with more creative people than us, we will look like traditional empaths because we are relatively less creative. If we join a too-empathic society, we feel like we are innovators because we are relatively less empathic in that community. The relationship between our communities and ourselves determines our personalities.
In the questioner’s case, she was an innovative empath but felt like she became a traditional empath after giving birth to her children. Infants are usually weaker and more sensitive than adults. It means she had joined a new environment that required more empathy than before. That is why she felt like she had changed her personality.
However, if we judge our personalities from the perspective of global society, they are usually stable. We cannot change our personalities, no matter how we try to change our insides.
The two aspects that tell us about our solid personalities
In such a case, knowing our two aspects tells us our permanent personalities.
If we are innovative empaths, we have two senses: empathy and creativity. They are contradictory, but our talents. Those two senses allow us to recognize the world correctly and efficiently.
Our two sides come and go in waves, both long-term and short-term. Even if we have always been creative, we may become empathic after changing our situations, such as giving birth to children, like the above questioner.
Traditional empaths vs. innovative empaths
It doesn’t mean we have become traditional empaths from the perspective of global society. Although traditional empaths are as empathic as we are, they have a different side to us. They prefer sociality to logical judgment. They decide things through social evaluation.
For example, traditional empaths usually don’t visit this blog because it is logical and has no social status. Traditional empaths choose the famous or trending ones first. Logic doesn’t matter for them.
In other words, they believe in someone with authority first, then his logic. Logical consistency doesn’t matter.
On the other hand, innovative empaths judge logical consistency first, then the teacher. The social status of the teacher doesn’t matter.
Those two ways of life are different, even if they both have empathy. Perhaps that makes us feel we cannot judge like traditional empaths. We cannot believe logic just because it is the word of a person with authority.
All people have at least two aspects. That combination determines our personalities.
The possibility that the unexpected side brings us
That gives us opportunities. The unexpected side could lead us to new futures.
For example, I know a story writer who wrote love stories energetically. However, she lost interest in it after her marriage. She felt a sense of loss because she felt like she had lost a part of herself.
However, she began to enjoy gardening after a while because the new house had a large garden. Then, she became a farmer, experimenting with new crop-growing methods.
In this case, she has switched from empathy to logical sense. Empathy allowed her to make love stories. On the other hand, trying new ways of nurturing crops is based on logical sense.
Living while changing ourselves
Our tastes are changing. It is natural. Many factors would switch our two aspects based on our stages of life.
It is not just about losing something. It is about gaining something new from the perspective of another aspect.
If we are heading in the wrong direction, we will get stuck, no matter how we switch our two aspects. On the other hand, if we go in a comfortable direction, we can progress in our lives while advancing our two senses.
Our two aspects allow us to break through if we are going in the right direction. Perhaps independence will be the direction for innovative empaths.
Conclusion
Knowing our aspects would tell us how to deal with this mental change.
Our two sides come and go in waves, both long-term and short-term.
That might turn our concerns into new possibilities.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
