I have long talked about the dualistic problem-solving method for over a month. Maybe this is the final one. Today, I will explain how to use it for our mental health.
How to resolve our mental complex
Sometimes, we want to resolve our mental complex. It often confuses our values and drives us to do unwanted things. Even though we know deep down that we don’t want it, something else within us controls our bodies.
For example, imagine this situation: someone tells us, “Can’t you even do this?”
If we have healthy minds, we don’t care about it. We can say honestly, “I don’t like it,” or “Sorry, I am not good at it.”
Uncontrollable emotions
However, if we have a mental complex, we cannot go against those words. We feel various emotions, such as anger, sadness, envy, feelings of depression, and helplessness. They make us react impulsively. Even though we know it will end in exhaustion, we cannot stop it.
That is why we wish to solve the problem of a mental complex.
However, we sometimes don’t know how to do it. Another self within us drives us.
In such a case, the dualistic problem-solving method might help. It tells us where to balance our minds. That can give us the honesty to let go of what we don’t want.
Explaining mental complex with duality
The concept of duality allows us to explain mental issues well.
We have duality. In other words, we are always contradictory.
For example, we sometimes want to be active but sometimes rest. We wish for change but also stability. We desire a peaceful life without hard problems but also a challenging one with tough situations.
That is why we become unrecognizable to ourselves. It is normal for us not to comprehend anything other than how we feel right now.
However, social life usually forces people to show only one aspect of themselves. For example, society tends to value active people and achievement.
That makes us feel that the nature of others is easy to understand for us, even though everyone has contradictory aspects. In other words, we misunderstand people’s nature.
Sometimes, unfortunately, our parents or teachers believe people should be consistent. They forced us to show only one side of our wants.
The perspective of duality
The concept of duality makes it easier to understand the complex phenomenon.
One example is the other self within us. It looks elusive because it often reacts inconsistently. Sometimes, it goes against our wants. However, it sometimes excessively amplifies our desires. That makes us hard to deal with.
However, it is consistent from the perspective of our duality. We can make its behaviors simple to explain, as follows:
- When we try to focus more only on one side, our bodies tell us the values of the other side more intensively. This is because our bodies want balance. This is often expressed as an inner child. The inner child goes against our will.
- When others look down on us for the values we usually focus on, our bodies amplify repulsion more than necessary. This is because our bodies want to release stress caused by our emotional suppression. This is one of the states of manic psychosis. In this case, another self accelerates the aspect we lean toward excessively.
- If others look down on us and our bodies are too exhausted, it comes out as a feeling of depression. This persistent condition is depression.
This inconsistency makes us feel like there is the other self within us.
Like above, the concept of duality explains mental issues well.
The cross-judging method and duality
The dualistic problem-solving method could solve this problem. In this method, we assume we have two contradictory aspects. Balancing them brings us a reasonable way of life.
A typical example is the cross-judging method I created last year (the summary is in this article). It is one example of an application of the dualistic problem-solving method, although I didn’t notice it at that time.
In the cross-judging method, we assume we have two axes of contradictory wants. They are as follows:
- The axis of empathy and logical sense: Both are compatible with us.
- The axis of independence and dependence: One is compatible with us and the other is not.
In my case, I found that I had been leaning too much toward empathy on the former axis, so I balanced it. I stopped many emotional activities. That brought me a balanced mind on the former axis. That also stabilized the latter axis naturally because it is clear to judge which side suits me.
In my opinion, the imbalance of our familiar senses significantly affects our confusion about values. The cross-judging method allows us to balance it.
That leads to immediate mental problem-solving.
The changes after I balanced them
After I balanced them, I realized I could easily say,
“Sorry, I don’t like it.”
“Sorry, I am not good at it. If you want, please rely on others.”
“I am not in such a mood.”
In addition, I naturally stopped thinking about my self-image. I understand I am I. Looking back now, creating a self-image was strange because I already had enough uniqueness. Why do I have to improve it? What I wanted was a balanced life based on my swinging mood.
This means I became honest with myself. Balancing two contradictory aspects is the same as becoming honest with oneself. Naturally, we will no longer be swayed by others’ values.
Of course, I often have to make compromises. We cannot live an ideal life immediately. However, I know that is a compromise. There is no confusion. We can keep our values.
Conclusion
That is the perspective of the dualistic problem-solving method.
It accurately tells us what is wrong and where to balance our minds. An example is the cross-judging method I created last year.
This method might solve the problem of your mental complex.
Thank you for reading this article. I hope to see you in the next one.
